So yes, this is another story with sort of a lame plot written by Kez. Lol.
I guess I'm back .. so.. just let me know what you think :)
And the story begins...Edit
I lost her
She's never coming back
I don't understand
I can't keep on track
I closed my notebook and rested my head against the car’s glass window. It’s a small town which pretty much makes it a good choice for clearing my head. Plus, I haven’t been around here for such a long time anyway.
“You’re gonna love what your grandma did to your room. Well, it almost seems like how you left it when you were ten but a whole lot better” Gramps said as he broke the silence. He was dressed in a white old shirt and an old faded pair of jeans. He’s been driving for about half an hour now since he picked me up at the airport.
“Thanks for picking me up, by the way” I gave him a faint smile. I smoothed out the skirt of my short light blue dress and fixed my black knitted cardigan as my dark wavy hair swayed with the wind.
Focusing his eyes on the road, he smiled. “No problem, kiddo. It’s been six long years since you paid us a visit anyway."
“I know” I blurted trying my best not to make him feel bad. “I just hope that I wouldn’t ruin the summer for you guys with me being… a bit gloomy and all.”
Gramps took his eyes off the road and looked at me. “Look, I know that you miss your mom and what happened to her was something that we never expected, but I just want you to know that your Gran and I are gonna help you get through this, alright?”
“Thanks, Gramps” I sighed. It was painful for me to lose a parent, so losing a daugher must be painful for them too. I leaned my head back against the car seat and closed my eyes. This is going to be a long summer.
I opened my eyes after a few long hours of deep slumber. I could instantly tell that it was night time since the only thing that I can see in my room aside from the silhouettes of the furniture were the little glowing stars placed all over the ceiling. Just by looking at them reminds me of my mom. She was the one who placed those little stars up there when I was five. She even aligned some of them to form some constellations like the Big Dipper, Little Dipper and Orion’s belt. I slowly rolled out of my bed and headed towards the door. Supper must be ready right about now.
“So how was your sleep?” my grandmother asked as she was slicing a whole leg off her famous roasted chicken. She usually prepares this kind of dish on special occassions. I never got the chance to visit this place for six long years so I guess this counts as one.
“Long and replenishing” I managed to say with a smile as she placed the chicken leg on my plate. “The trip got me exhausted.”
“We can tell since the moment you reached your room you crashed on your bed like an airplane.” Gramps chuckled as he chewed on a piece of chicken.
We spent the rest of dinner time talking and eating (of course). Gran’s chocolate cream pie never disappoints. Gramps told me about how the farm’s been having it’s progress. Though the thing is, the farm’s an hour drive away from the house so he pretty much gets up and starts driving before sunrise. As for Gran, she continues doing two of her favorite things in the world: Gardening and painting. She would sometimes sell some of her flowers to the local flower shop or even some of her paintings to some people who would love to buy them. As I listened to their stories, I realized how long it was since I talked to them like this. Sure, they would visit us every Christmas and New Year’s Eve, but it wasn’t just them who would visit us during the holidays. I guess I never really got the chance to spend time with my them during those times because I was always busy hanging out with my cousins.
After dinner, I kissed my grandparents good night then headed back to my room. I volunteered in washing the dishes but Gran insisted that I should get ready for bed since Gramps decided to take me to the farm tomorrow. I put on my jammies right after my warm bath, tucked myself in my bed and stared at my glowing star covered ceiling. My mom used to tuck me in every night in this very same room. I gave myself a sigh and closed my tired eyes. As usual, a tear or two would start to fall. Sometimes I just can’t help but wish that I can just turn back the time and go back… back to those days when horrible things can’t seem to happen… back to those days when I still have her.
My adventure with Gramps at the farm turned out pretty great. The old man’s about eighty years old but he sure can work. I watched him for hours working with the farm’s workers. He works as if he’s not the one who owns the land. By the end of the day, he would always compliment and thank the workers for working. I guess that’s what made him such a very much loved boss.
Later that night, in spite of how fun my day with Gramps seemed to be, I couldn’t sleep. I’ve been staring at the ceiling and have been tossing and turning for about three hours now. It’s not that thing where you can’t sleep because you keep on remembering the happy moments that happened, but it’s that thing where you feel uneasy all of a sudden like there’s something that you need to do or let out and you don’t even know why. I’ve felt something like this so many times before and whenever it happens, I would just grab my pen and my notebook and just start writing something. I did try doing that but it just doesn’t work like there’s something missing. That’s when I realized what I needed to do.
Living a lie
I can't deny
Things aren’t okay
Pain won’t go away
Sick of trying
Sick of crying
Alone in the dark
Waiting for sparks
I can’t explain
Tired of the pain
Things aren’t the same
Is life just a game?
I return to the place
There was an empty space
It can’t be returned
The memories are burned
Waiting for a rescue
The feelings just flew
So just to be frank
Everything’s just blank
I took a deep breath and stared at the page on my notebook. I’ve been writing for about twenty minutes and I guess this is what’s been going inside my head all along. Another gloomy poem about loss.
I put my notebook down along with my pen and laid down on the fine soft sand. I listened to sound of the things around me like the waves crashing on the shores and the faint calls of the seagulls. Why did I come here in the middle of the night, you may ask? Trust me, I have no idea. But right now, I guess this is where I can feel safe, where I can breathe and where I can think. As an addition to that fact, I can get a full view of the stars here.
I was listening to nature’s lullaby while closing my eyes when I started hearing the sound of footsteps. Guessing it’s time for me to go since I’m not into talking to other people at the moment, I quickly stood up, grabbed my stuff and started walking.
“Should’ve brought a flashlight” I muttered. I felt the grass beneath my feet as I continued walking in the dark. As I took that one step further away from where I was, before I even knew it, I let out a scream before hitting a surface. I then realized, I have fallen down a hole.
“Are you okay?” I heard a voice call out in just a few seconds. I looked up and saw a silhouette holding a flashlight.
“Nothing broken” I answered.
“What now?” I asked as he settled me on a rock so that I can sit down. I may have told him that I didn’t break anything while I was down on that stupid pit, but the moment I stood up, I found out that I sprained my ankle. After I got out because of his help, he carried me back to the beach a few meters away from where I was before near the lighthouse.
“Hold still” he said as he knelt down and settled my sprained ankle on his lap. He seems to be knowing what he’s doing.
“Wait, what are you---“ I watched him pulled out a dark cloth out of his pocket. “Oh, okay” I said as he started wrapping my bad foot with his handkerchief.
“Now, you tell me what’s a girl like you doing in a beach at a time like this?” he asked as he securely tied the handkerchief on my ankle. He then looked up right at me and the moment he did that, I met his eyes. Those eyes that sparkled just like the tiny little stars that are watching right up above us.
“What is a guy like you doing in a beach at a time like this, you tell me” I answered.
“Fair enough” he stood up. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw something fall out of his pocket. Something small enough that can just easily fit at the palm of your hand --- something with the shape of a star. He then realized that he dropped it because he bent down to pick it up.
“Whatcha got there?” I asked.
He sat down right beside me and opened up his hand. “It’s nothing. Just a starfish that I found along the way.” He handed the starfish to me so that I can see it better. “Now what are you really doing here? It’s the middle of the night.”
“I don’t know” I said as I looked at the starfish. “For air… space.. to breathe...”
“I see what you mean” he said. “I always come here whenever I feel useless or whenever I feel like I’m in a tight spot and that I can’t get out. Everwhere you go there will always be rough times.”
I took a deep breath then let out a sigh as the cold breeze passed by. “That’s the problem. There’s pain and I hate it. It always demands to be felt.”
“But hey, that’s life right?” he said as he let out a little laugh.
“Sad story” I smiled. I’ve known this guy for about twenty minutes and --- oh wait, scratch that, I don’t even know who he is yet but here we are talking about life’s ups and downs. It feels right, but a little bit wrong. “I think I should get going.” The moment I stood up I felt a little bit woozy like something’s pulling me back. For a second there I thought I was gonna end up in a pit again but then I felt like something’s got me… or someone. Once again I met his eyes, those deep brown eyes that shone in the dim faint light. “Thanks” I said.
“Don’t sweat it. Are you sure you’re alright with that ankle of yours? I can help you walk your way home” he offered as he helped me on my feet.
“I’m good” I reassured. What am I supposed to say now? Should I say good night or goodbye or something? “Listen, it was nice meeting you and your starfish” I said as I handed him his dead little sea creature. “Thanks for saving me from that stupid dark pit.” Smooth. Real smooth.
“Keep it” he said. “Take it as welcome back gift.”
“Really?” My eyebrows met. “Well, thank you.” How did he know that I just got back? Oh well, it’s a small town anyway. “Good night” I said as I went on my way.
“It’s Tyler by the way” I heard him yell.
I shaked my head and turned around as I smiled at him. “Kayla.”
I rolled out of bed and headed straight to the shower. After putting on some clothes, I grabbed a pair of slippers and half-limped my way downstairs. Passing by the living room, an old 60 inch aquarium caught my attention. Inside, it has nothing else but rocks and sand. Maybe I should think about asking Gran and Gramps for some water living animals to live in it.
“Gramps left already?” I asked Gran as I entered the kitchen.
“Sure did. He said you were sleeping like a little baby which is why he didn’t wake you up” Gran answered. Sitting on a chair by the window, she unfolded her freshly delivered newspaper.
Trying my best not to make Gran notice my slightly injured ankle, I grabbed a bowl and a box of cereal from the cupboard and immediately sat down on a chair facing her right across the round dark mahogany table. Gran sipped her coffee and went back to reading her newspaper. “Any plans for today?” she asked.
“Nope” I answered. I chewed on the spoonful of cereal inside my mouth one last time and swallowed it. “Maybe I’ll just stay home and write today. What about you, Gran?”
Gran folded her newspaper and settled it on the table. “Well, I wish I can stay home and spend some time with you, but I promised Mrs. Hampson I’d help her at the flower shop today. You remember her, right?”
“They moved here in town a few days before I flew back to California six years ago, I remember” I said with a smile.
“You know it.” Gran stood up and grabbed her purse on the kitchen counter. “I’ll see you this afternoon, then?”
“I’ll be here” I said. “Gran?”
“The aquarium in the living room. It’s been pretty lonely all these years. Maybe we can break the chain and do something about it?”
Gran smiled. “Say no more, sweetie. Your grandfather and I already thought about that. Which is why Mrs. Hampson’s grandson is coming over later to bring in the fishes and other things that we ordered. His father owns the local pet store.”
“I see” I answered. “I get to decorate the aquarium then?”
“Yes, you do” she chuckled.
I was sitting by the corner a few meters away from the left side of the hospital bed. There she was, half lying there while reading a book in her hospital gown which covered her chest with tumors. I looked at her as if it was the last time I will ever see her being like this. Her dark wavy hair which was used to be long and running about a few inches beneath her shoulders, now cut short with a length of just an inch beneath her ears. Her skin, used to be full of life and color, now a little bit dry and wrinkly. Some say I look a lot like her when she was my age while some say I look exactly like her when she was my age. See the difference? Anyway, there I was staring at her while she let herself in another world as she continued reading her book. Tears slowly lined my eyes as I exhaled an almost sob. In just a snap, she stopped reading her book in order to look at me.
“Kayla?” she said as she placed her book on the bedside table. She had that look on her face that she always had everytime she looked at me. It always felt like she already knows what I was going to say or what was bothering my mind.
I stood up and walked over to her. Sitting on the side of the bed, I held her hand as her brown eyes met mine. “I don’t want to lose you” I said as I choked back on my tears. “Mom.”
“Mom!” I screamed as my eyes suddenly opened out of a nap. It was a dream. It was only a dream. No. It wasn’t just a dream. It wasn’t just a dream because it happened before. What I just had was a flashback… a memory… a memory that has been haunting me for months. I hate it, I really do. How on earth can you ever move on if what you are tying to get away from keeps chasing after you like it programmed itself to believe that you are meant to be together forever?
I sat up, adjusting myself on the couch. Catching my breath, I ran my hands on my cheeks upon realizing they were wet with both tears and sweat. Not again. I thought. I slumped my head on the couch enhaling that old couchy smell as I screamed. “Why is this happening to me?!"
As soon as those words escaped out of my mouth, I heard a buzz. I quickly stood up and groaned as I felt a little pang on my ankle. Perfect timing. I rolled my eyes as I limped my way towards the door in order to open it. It must be Mrs. Hampson’s grandson. Gram said he’ll be coming today to deliver the fishes and stuff anyway. This should distract me from my personal dillemmas.
After fixing myself up for about five seconds, I opened the door revealing a familiar face. Wow. This is just… wow.
“Hi” he said with a smile. Once again, I found myself staring at those deep brown eyes that saved me the night before.